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The ups + downs of chronic pain

 

 

This is me, Thursday night just gone, in massive pain and laying on hot water bottles. 

 

I’ve had chronic pain for about the last nine or ten years after I wrote off my motorbike and landed on my head.

 

Didn’t know for the first seven years that it was a bulging disc in my neck causing issues as my main symptom was neck and shoulder pain. 

 

Started getting a mad headache on Wednesday which by Thursday was a good 8/10 on the pain scale, which is generally when I feel like I’ve been bottled over the back of the head ~ a crazy headache, neck and shoulder pain, limited movement in my neck, swollen ear, my jaw is out of alignment and can’t open my mouth too wide. 

 

It’s my own fault though.

 

For weeks/months I’ve been working at a flat out pace from 5am to 8.30pm and work had crept into my weekends too.

 

As a small biz owner who also has a full time hectic day job, I find I’m switched on 24/7 with clients all around the world in different time zones. 

 

I use FB for biz as well as for personal stuff and it can be a challenge to separate the two. 

 

I did three massive steps to up level my biz from December:

 

👩🏼‍💻 getting my website completely redesigned and rebranded

🤙🏼 signed up to an awesome mastermind where I’m being coached and learning how to go to the next level 

👥 finally hired a VA who’s taking over all my admin work as I’m too busy to do it

 

But while all of it has the end goal of creating more ease and flow in my biz and life, it’s had the opposite effect while I’m in learning mode, training my VA and handing stuff over to my website guy. 

 

I’ve found myself relentlessly thinking about work and not switching off, feeling way too busy and not getting enough Carly time. 

 

Last year, my big goal was to create more peace, ease and flow

 

While I know these huge upgrades are working towards that, I know it’s also giving me the opposite right now. 

 

And even though I’m SO. FREAKING. EXCITED about how many more people I can help, there’s that part of me that is also craving more time to myself. 

 

So. 

 

My body quit on me. 

 

I felt exhausted, and have spent the last two nights having a coma sleep (much needed). 

 

I’m spending loads of time relaxing, in traction, doing yin yoga, meditating, and reading while laying on ice packs and hot water bottles.

 

Body, I’m listening

I love you

I’m sorry 

Please forgive me

Thank you

 

I did schema therapy a couple of years ago and my top two schemas were “unrelenting standards” and “self sacrifice”. 

 

I still have these internal schemas driving me from time to time and have to actively fight against them to step into a space of surrender and peace.

 

We are ALL a work in progress.

 

Just because I teach this shit, doesn’t mean I don’t fuck it up myself from time to time.

 

But I’m aware I’m doing it, and know what to do to get back on track.

 

Body, I love you. 

I’m listening.

 

Time to scale back work and focus on my health, and my goal of peace again!

 

Does any of this resonate for you?

 

As always, if you want a guide on your journey, drop me a message and let’s chat about how coaching and/or energy work can help. 

 

And come over and join my free group here

 

Catcha on the flip side,

 

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