Have you ever spent time with someone and walked away feeling like they’ve sucked the fucking life out of you?
Or had a conversation with someone who’s going through a tough time and suddenly found yourself feeling totally fried, knackered, anxious or weighed down by THEIR problems?
Maybe you’re the person everyone comes to when their life goes to shit. 💩
You’re the listener.
The helper.
The fixer. 🔨 🔧
The one who’s always there – the “strong” one.
Being compassionate is a wonderful quality, but there’s a big difference between caring about someone and carrying their shit for them.
ENERGETIC CORDS AND COMPASSIONATE CONNECTIONS
Cords are energetic connections that can form between people, especially when there’s a strong emotional attachment or sense of responsibility.
Compassionate connections are similar, but often involve feeling so much empathy or sympathy for someone that we unconsciously take on responsibility for their wellbeing.
I often find these cords during energy treatments, particularly with clients who feel drained by certain relationships.
These clients need to learn that you can love someone without being responsible for fixing their life. 🤷🏼♀️
You can support them without rescuing them.
You can listen without absorbing all their problems.
And you can say NO without feeling like a selfish arsehole.
WHEN COMPASSION BECOMES SELF-SACRIFICE
Sometimes our desire to help comes from our own limiting beliefs.
Maybe you learned that being useful made you lovable.
Perhaps you feel guilty when you put yourself first. 🥺
Or maybe you’ve spent years believing it’s your job to keep everyone else happy.
These patterns are especially common in people who’ve experienced difficult relationships, childhood adversity or environments where they stayed safe by keeping other people happy.
And sometimes we keep repeating those behaviours long after the original circumstances have changed.
In energy work, I explore whether there are cords, compassionate connections or limiting beliefs associated with these dynamics.
But energetic clearing is only part of the process.
Recognising the pattern and changing how you respond matters too; this is where coaching sessions or kinesiology are my preferred next step with the client.
There’s not much point clearing a cord if you immediately go back to sacrificing your own wellbeing to rescue everyone else (which I see a lot of my clients do when we haven’t healed enough of the reasons those cords were attached in the first place).
YOU CAN CARE WITHOUT CARRYING THEIR BAGGAGE 🧳
Their problems aren’t automatically your responsibility just because you love them.
Their disappointment doesn’t mean you’ve done something wrong.
Their emotions aren’t yours to manage.
And setting boundaries doesn’t mean you don’t care.
Sometimes the most loving thing you can do is support someone while allowing them to take responsibility for their own choices – this also means you stop enabling their shitty choices. ✋🏼
And sometimes the most important person you need to start showing compassion towards…is yourself.
If you’re constantly feeling depleted by certain relationships, an energy treatment can offer an opportunity to explore these patterns through an energetic lens, alongside the practical boundaries that support your wellbeing.
So tell me… are you actually just caring about someone, or have you been carrying their shit for far too long?
DM me to check my availability or check the link in my bio if you’re ready to book in.
