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Browsing Tag

relationships

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How are you allowing your partner to treat you?

I was chatting to a friend the other day about a guy she’s been seeing for a few months. She was really upset about the way she’s being treated and she’s well aware that she’s allowing it to happen due to her own limiting beliefs and self-worth issues.  Not everyone is as aware as my friend about how much she is feeding into the situation. A lot of us in relationships can get stuck into blame and victim mode when things aren’t going…

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Not this, not anymore

At some point in our life, most of us get to a point where we are confronted with that awful moment of realisation that we’ve ended up in a bad or sticky spot. You know, that moment where you think ohhhhh shit I need to leave this job/relationship/career/home/country or whatever it is.  Or maybe you realise you need to stop thinking or behaving in a certain way, or that the thing you’ve been blamed for IS actually your fault. Maybe…

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Why compromise when you can harmonise?

Recently I was chatting to a coaching client about some of the difficulties she’s facing in her relationship. She mentioned that she and her partner were having to compromise on certain things. compromise ˈkɒmprəmʌɪz/ noun 1. an agreement or settlement of a dispute that is reached by each side making concessions. “Eventually they reached a compromise.” 2. the expedient acceptance of standards that are lower than is desirable. “Sexism should be tackled without compromise” The nature of compromising often leads…

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7 signs you’re dating a sociopath

This week I was chatting to a friend about her recent relationship break up. As I was listening to her tell me about the abuse and manipulation she suffered, and how confused she was about it, and how despite how much of an arsehole he was to her she still wanted him to be ok, I realised we were talking about a sociopath.When you hear the term “sociopath” the movie Psycho might spring to mind, so let me unpack the…

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The 5 love languages

This week I seem to be talking to a lot of my coaching clients about issues within their relationships. My first port of call when discussing relationship challenges is to look at the 5 love languages. This is an amazing relationship book written by Gary Chapman, where he states that each of us tend to have a preferred way of communicating our love. A blog I wrote in the past discusses the nature of Transactional Analysis in relationships where, in conflict…

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How can I help a friend who’s in a sh*tty relationship?

Yesterday I got the following question posted up on my Coach Carly Facebook page: “how do you help a friend who is in a very controlling emotionally abusive relationship?”  As a transformational life coach who also teaches Reiki and so works in the energy realms a lot, there were two branches to my suggestions – the first was how to support the friend, and the second (but more important aspect) was how to look after your own energy.  I have…

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