The other day I was listening to a podcast and the guest said “it’s easier to act your way into a new way of thinking than to think your way into a new way of acting.
I totally agree.
If you can’t see the video below you can watch it here on YouTube.
It reminded me of watching Tony Robbins speak with someone in his audience who had depression.
To show them how in control they are of getting out of their depression, he would ask them to really feel into their depression in the deepest darkest way, to change their body language to match when they are depressed and to change their self talk to the kind of things they tell themselves when they’re depressed.
Then he will something like chuck his glass of water on them, or ask them when the last time they gave their partner an intimate act was!
It totally throws them off guard and they’re shocked at what he’s done or said.
He then asks them to get back to their previous state, and they find it much harder because he snapped them out of their state in an epic way.
By doing this, Tony is showing that they have choice, control and power over the way that they are being, which any depressed person will think they don’t have any control at all.
He’s teaching them that they are doing depression. (By the way, if you’re depressed right now and this is making you angry, I’ve had depression too and can speak from experience).
We’re told in positive thinking theories that if you take the negative thought you’re thinking and instead think a more positive thought, that you can trick your mind into thinking more positive. This can definitely be true, but it can also be a hard slog doing it that way.
A much quicker and easier way (I’m all about the short cuts yo! As long as they’re just as/more effective) is to act as if, kind of like the “fake it ’til you make it” saying.
So for example, if you’re down in the dumps right now, then imagine what you would be doing if you were your best self. How would you be walking or holding your body? What would you be doing with your gaze, looking upwards and around you? What would you be doing with your hands? Then go and do that.
If you’re doing something where you need confidence, like going for a job interview or giving a presentation, then act as if you’re confident even if you’re nervous – look people in the eye, stand up straight and tall, give a firm handshake.
Think of how you are when you are your best self, and display that. If that isn’t so easy then instead think of a “power person” – someone you admire who displays the traits and behaviour that you’d like to show. Pink! the singer is a great example a lot of my clients love – she’s a strong, confident, dominant woman who doesn’t take any shit and imagine how much she’d smash a job interview or presentation!
Give it a try with something in your life today and let me know how you go 🙂
Catcha on the flip side,