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Browsing Tag

values

I don’t know who I am anymore: the death of identity

As I approach “mid life,” I notice that more and more people around me are starting to feel like they don’t know who they are anymore.   The age milestone of 40 seems to bring with it a loss of identity for a lot of people.   Relationship breakdowns, divorce, bring with it the loss of identity as a husband, wife, family unit.   We lose grandparents and parents, and get closer to being next in line.   Maybe we suddenly…

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What happens if my partner isn’t on board with my goals?

  It’s normal for us to want those we love the most to be supportive of our goals.   But sometimes, this isn’t our reality.   Recently a member of my online course asked me, “what do I do if my partner isn’t on board with my goals?”   It totally depends on what the context is around this.   We all have our own personal goals, as well as shared goals with our partner and family.   But sometimes…

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18 life lessons from a helper (recovering rescuer-enabler) type

After spending most of my life helping others, and often (in the past) to my detriment, I thought I’d share some learnings that I wish someone had shared with me. ❤️‍🩹   PEOPLE CAN CHANGE, BUT WE CAN’T CHANGE THEM   As a helper type it’s so natural to want to dive in and help people we see in need, especially those closest to us. 🥹   We do this because we believe everyone has the capacity to change; over…

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Are you being your true authentic self?

“I am what I think others think I am.”Read that a few times and notice the power (and truth) in that statement.We live in a world based on a perception within a perception.We have all these perceptions (illusions and lies) about what our partner, boss, friend, parent etc thinks about us, and we act accordingly.Bit mad isn’t it?It means that most of the time, we aren’t being our true, authentic selves.Do we even know who our authentic self even is?Do…

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How are you allowing your partner to treat you?

I was chatting to a friend the other day about a guy she’s been seeing for a few months.She was really upset about the way she’s being treated and she’s well aware that she’s allowing it to happen due to her own limiting beliefs and self-worth issues. Not everyone is as aware as my friend about how much she is feeding into the situation.A lot of us in relationships can get stuck into blame and victim mode when things aren’t going well.Why do they…

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Things that bother you the most conflict with your values the most

Are you in conflict with your values? Knowing what I now know about my values, it’s easy to see why certain situations in my life were stressful or painful for me. My most important value is integrity, and I’ve felt really tested when I’ve seen a lack of integrity around me, or when I’ve been out of integrity myself. When we’re in conflict with our most important values it can really do our head in – we mull over the…

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