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Browsing Tag

control

MAFS, Coercive control and dickheads

  I don’t watch MAFS generally but one of my friends was very insistent this week that I watch what’s unfolding with dickhead (whoops, I mean Adrian) and Awhina, so I set myself up a 9 now account and got stuck into some clips. 🤔 My friend started out as a client quite a while ago now and back then knew nothing about coercive control and domestic abuse. After quite a few sessions together, I’m proud to say she’s regularly…

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An open reply to an email I received

  Last week I got the following email via the contact form on my website: “All this advice, advice, advice!  Why doesn’t anyone EVER acknowledge the limitations put upon us by those who control the narrative?  Those who make the laws and decide our options?  It’s near to impossible to create the life you want when society decides it for you and expects you to toe the line?  I’m all for making my dreams come true… if only “they” would…

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Today I won’t stress over things I can’t control

  How much of your day do you spend stressing about things you have little to zero control over?   How much is that actually helping you in a positive way?   Ask yourself: does stressing + worrying about anything actually help me through it?   Or does it just run your body + mind down? rumina Can you find ways to surrender to the process instead?    Try out some of these things to calm your nervous system if…

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Let’s talk about shame

    I was listening to a podcast about domestic abuse yesterday.    The woman being interviewed works in the field with survivors + training professionals.   She was sharing her experience of her own abusive relationship + the shame she felt being in one while also working in the field, as well as how it changed her work.   It brought up so many parallels for me that I wanted to share.    I never share this stuff from…

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7 Steps to reclaim your power

  1. Avoid blaming someone or something else for your negative feelings. Nothing and nobody has the power to control how you think and feel unless you let it.   2. Don’t blame yourself for not being in control. You’re doing the best you can.   3. Be aware of when you’re playing the victim role. Learn the clues that tell you when you’re not being responsible for what you’re being/doing/having/feeling.   4. Get to know your biggest energy –…

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Panic! Panic! Everything is out of control!

  In the West we say “panic panic! Everything is out of control!” In the Buddhist world they say “relax relax! Everything is out of control.”   I heard this quote on a podcast recently where they were talking about the current pandemic and increased fear and anxiety globally.   While of course there are things that we can control, like our own personal hygiene, there is much we cannot.   So instead of joining everyone else in panicking, do…

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