We tend to think the way other people treat us is to do with us personally. Most of the time, that’s not true. ☺️ Most of the time what people say is actually nothing to do with you. It’s a projection of their own reality, the way they see life is through their own tinted kinda glasses. 🤓 Glasses framed by their past life experiences, their belief system, their traumas + triggers. The…
Most of us in life experience at least one relationship that becomes toxic for us. I’ve had my share of long term relationships that were abusive and codependent where I ended up as a shell of who I was. 😶🌫️ Leaving is hard because you’ve lost all confidence in who you are as a person. Toxic people show traits of narcissism and borderline personality disorder among other things; they have attachment issues from childhood which…
1. Avoid blaming someone or something else for your negative feelings. Nothing and nobody has the power to control how you think and feel unless you let it. 2. Don’t blame yourself for not being in control. You’re doing the best you can. 3. Be aware of when you’re playing the victim role. Learn the clues that tell you when you’re not being responsible for what you’re being/doing/having/feeling. 4. Get to know your biggest energy –…
I was listening to an awesome Lewis Howes podcast recently where the interviewee was describing the reactions of narcissists to certain things. One of the things she said was “never tell a narcissist your good news first”. Tell your cheerleaders first – the people in your life who love and support you unconditionally so you can continue to feel good and celebrate for a while. The reason for this is that they’ll turn any bit…
I heard on a podcast the other day, “enabling comes in many forms”. How true that is. enabler /ɪˈneɪblə,ɛˈneɪblə/ A person who encourages or enables negative or self-destructive behaviour in another. I’ve spent many years in the past enabling others to continue to treat me in a certain way, or continue a certain pattern of behaviour without setting boundaries. I’ve enabled people to continue an addiction. I’ve enabled people to continue living in…
I love this quote by Ernest Hemingway; “We are all broken. That’s how the light gets in.” Reminds me of a blog I wrote on kintsukuroi, a Japanese technique where they take broken items and piece them back together with gold, the idea being that we are more beautiful for having been broken. The most amazing people I’ve ever met are those who truly know what it is to feel broken, and to learn, heal and…