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self esteem

Love yourself so much that when you get treated like sh1t you recognise it

    How would your life be if you truly loved, honoured and respected yourself?   If you honoured your needs each day?   If you lived in integrity with your values in each moment?   I find this is a really useful – and often – confronting question to ask my clients, one they get pretty immediate answers to.   I work with a lot of very natural “helper” types – I’m one of those too.   There can…

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5 signs you’re dating a toxic person

Are you in a relationship (or friendship) where there seems to be a lot of drama that leaves you confused?You might be dating a toxic person.IN AN ARGUMENT THEY LOOK TO INFLICT DAMAGE NOT SOLVE PROBLEMSThey do this because they’re trying to protect themselves from a perceived threat to themselves or to the relationship.If you’re showing signs of being independent – such as going out with your friends without them – they won’t show their vulnerability to you.If they’re feeling…

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We teach people how to treat us

As we grow as individuals and get to know ourselves more, we become more aware of our values and what’s important to us in life.That includes how we want to be treated.But what does this really mean?It mostly comes down to our personal boundaries, which stem from our sense of self-worth. Someone with a low self-worth doesn’t love themselves enough, or think they’re worthy enough, to stand up to those who are treating them badly. Someone with a healthy level of self-worth and self-love will have strong…

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Where are you not being true to yourself?

Recently I’ve been coaching clients through such a vast range of different challenges – separation and divorce, drug addiction, procrastination, finding their purpose, feelings of depression/anxiety/suicidal thoughts, and recovery from past trauma. While these issues may seem totally different from each other, there is a huge, overarching theme that connects them all – a lack of self love and limiting beliefs holding us back. On the face of it, a lack of self love isn’t always obvious. You might be…

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What I’m learning from Project Self Love (that will be true for you too)

If you can’t see the video above, click here to watch on YouTube. A couple of weeks ago I shared this vulnerable post on Facebook where I talked about how I have become increasingly aware of this empty feeling inside, and despite 15 years of doing personal development on myself I couldn’t quite figure out where this feeling was coming from. It felt lonely, empty, sad, unhappy, dissatisfied and like there was this longing feeling – a sense of missing…

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How can I help a friend who’s in a sh*tty relationship?

Yesterday I got the following question posted up on my Coach Carly Facebook page: “how do you help a friend who is in a very controlling emotionally abusive relationship?”  As a transformational life coach who also teaches Reiki and so works in the energy realms a lot, there were two branches to my suggestions – the first was how to support the friend, and the second (but more important aspect) was how to look after your own energy.  I have…

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