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Browsing Tag

relationships

Where will you be in 5 years if you don’t invest in yourself now?

    Every now and again I get a message that goes something like this:   “I want coaching/Reiki/to learn Reiki/to change my life, but I don’t have any money.”   This immediately tells me something really important about that person.   They aren’t truly committed to making the changes they say they want in their life 🤷🏼‍♀️    I know straight away this person is hoping to get something for nothing, and I also know I could give them…

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From codependent relationships to healthy love

    I spent a good chunk of my life between my mid twenties to my late thirties in unhealthy codependent relationships.    A codependent relationship is a love addiction where we seek to prove our worth by helping people with broken wings💔   We’re drawn to addicts and under-functioners who’ll depend on us emotionally, financially or in some other way.    We also have a tendency to attract very narcissistic and abusive people who have a lot of shit…

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Do you feel heard?

    I read a beautiful quote the other day;   “Being heard is so close to being loved that for the average person, they are almost indistinguishable.” —David W. Augsburger   Active listening and really hearing what the other person is saying is a skill we can take for granted.   For a lot of people I work with, they’ve felt unheard for a lot of their lives.   This can lead to them shutting down and not bothering…

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See them as they are, not as how you want them to be

    I see you.   You’re the one that sees the potential in everyone.   You’re the one that gives people leeway for how they’re behaving, because you know the shit they went through in the past.   You know that people usually only hurt people when they are also hurting deep down.   You let them off when they behave badly, because you see the pain in them and know they didn’t really mean it.   One day…

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Are you rushing into your relationship?

    I’ve spent a lot of time reflecting on my past relationships, learning the lessons I was given along the way.   Between the ages of 17 and 38, a good chunk of those years were spent in relationships where I was cheated on many times, manipulated, coercively controlled, financially and emotionally abused, deprived of my liberty at times and slowly but surely turned into a shell of my former self with a very broken heart.   When I…

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It’s a happy day today

    Today I paid my deposit on my second block of land, not far from the beach. I’ve been itching to build again since I built my first home by the ocean in 2015/16. But rewind from here to the end of 2018, and I felt like I was in a hole. I’d been in a long term relationship where I’d been taken advantage of financially for a very long time. I found myself with my house in mortgage…

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