How would your life be if you truly loved, honoured and respected yourself? If you honoured your needs each day? If you lived in integrity with your values in each moment? I find this is a really useful – and often – confronting question to ask my clients, one they get pretty immediate answers to. I work with a lot of very natural “helper” types – I’m one of those too. There can…
I heard on a podcast the other day, “enabling comes in many forms”. How true that is. enabler /ɪˈneɪblə,ɛˈneɪblə/ A person who encourages or enables negative or self-destructive behaviour in another. I’ve spent many years in the past enabling others to continue to treat me in a certain way, or continue a certain pattern of behaviour without setting boundaries. I’ve enabled people to continue an addiction. I’ve enabled people to continue living in…
I saw the above title in a quote this week, and it really triggered a big reflection for me. A reflection on how many times in the past I’ve done exactly that – let the unacceptable become the acceptable. How in the past I’ve allowed myself to be treated with disrespect due to my own shitty boundaries. How I’ve allowed others to emotionally abuse me – some for years. How I gave my energy and power away on the…
It doesn’t matter who you are, or how successful you are – we all have shit from our past that can keep us stuck. Old, core wound shit that has led to feelings of being unlovable, unworthy, useless, stupid, not good enough. The core wound shit that has attracted people, situations and relationships into our lives that “prove” that we aren’t good enough over and over – until we do the work to heal our wounds. This stuff happens to all of us on some…
After spending most of my life helping others, and often (in the past) to my detriment, I thought I’d share some learnings that I wish someone had shared with me. PEOPLE CAN CHANGE, BUT WE CAN’T CHANGE THEM As a helper type it’s so natural to want to dive in and help people we see in need, especially those closest to us. We do this because we believe everyone has the capacity to change; over time, we…
“Attitude is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Kindness is a choice. Giving is a choice. Respect is a choice. Whatever choice you make makes you. Choose wisely.” – Roy T. Bennett We’ve all been treated unfairly at times ~ it’s part of life. Certain situations can lead us to feel angry, upset, mistreated and resentful. It’s perfectly normal to feel that way, but when you allow yourself to wallow in the drama of it all for…