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Coach Carly

Are you choosing to stay stuck?

    I was listening to an amazing, inspirational podcast interview the other day on “I Catch Killers with Gary Jubelin”.   Gary was interviewing Khalid Baker, who was convicted of a murder he’s always maintained he never committed.   He was only 18 and went on to spend 13 years in prison.   He talked about how he could have let anger consume him, but this would have led him to staying stuck.   He knew the system would…

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Are you enabling those you love?

  I heard on a podcast the other day, “enabling comes in many forms”.   How true that is.   enabler /ɪˈneɪblə,ɛˈneɪblə/   A person who encourages or enables negative or self-destructive behaviour in another.   I’ve spent many years in the past enabling others to continue to treat me in a certain way, or continue a certain pattern of behaviour without setting boundaries.   I’ve enabled people to continue an addiction.   I’ve enabled people to continue living in…

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Anger, the boy and the fence

  I heard this story on a podcast today and love it.   “There once was a little boy who had a very bad temper.   His father decided to hand him a bag of nails and said that every time the boy lost his temper, he had to hammer a nail into the fence.   On the first day, the boy hammered 37 nails into that fence.   The boy gradually began to control his temper over the next few weeks, and the number…

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Learn to love being alone

  I’ve never really believed in the old saying “two halves make a whole”.   It never really made sense to me.   Don’t two whole people make a better partnership?   If you’re half a person then you’re always looking for someone else to meet your needs instead of you being able to fill your cup without external sources.   When I was in my 20’s, I remember the feeling of looking at a whole weekend with no plans.…

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The quality of your emotions equals the quality of your life

  Do you agree with this statement?   On a daily basis I work with clients who struggle to manage their emotions.   Some are completely disconnected from them and have a hard time knowing how to even state what emotion they are feeling other than simply “good” or “bad”.   Being completely disconnected is often a protection mechanism – they feel they might unlock Pandora’s box and face all the shit they’re avoiding if they start to delve into…

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