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Browsing Tag

relationships

Are you rushing into your relationship?

    I’ve spent a lot of time reflecting on my past relationships, learning the lessons I was given along the way.   Between the ages of 17 and 38, a good chunk of those years were spent in relationships where I was cheated on many times, manipulated, coercively controlled, financially and emotionally abused, deprived of my liberty at times and slowly but surely turned into a shell of my former self with a very broken heart.   When I…

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It’s a happy day today

    Today I paid my deposit on my second block of land, not far from the beach. I’ve been itching to build again since I built my first home by the ocean in 2015/16. But rewind from here to the end of 2018, and I felt like I was in a hole. I’d been in a long term relationship where I’d been taken advantage of financially for a very long time. I found myself with my house in mortgage…

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Have compassion for others who feel broken

  I read an amazing post today written by a survivor of an abusive relationship which I really resonated with.   She talked about her behaviours in that relationship that other people would have judged her for – drinking to self-medicate, feeling unhappy, not being her best self.   She said that some friends didn’t get it as they didn’t see the lie she was living, with others seeing him as Mr Nice Guy and her the Drunken Idiot.  …

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How to stop living a mediocre life

  I was listening to the Ed Mylett Show the other day where Ed interviewed Dean Gratsiosi and the episode was SO good with so many takeaways that I wanted to share.   The guys had a good chat where they distilled down their top tips for living a happy and successful life; here’s my fave takeaways from the show about their blueprint for happiness.   HAPPINESS COMES FROM STRETCHING OURSELVES   Ed and Dean both live the kind of…

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Are you enabling those you love?

  I heard on a podcast the other day, “enabling comes in many forms”.   How true that is.   enabler /ɪˈneɪblə,ɛˈneɪblə/   A person who encourages or enables negative or self-destructive behaviour in another.   I’ve spent many years in the past enabling others to continue to treat me in a certain way, or continue a certain pattern of behaviour without setting boundaries.   I’ve enabled people to continue an addiction.   I’ve enabled people to continue living in…

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None of it was a waste

Sometimes I feel an almost overwhelming sadness about how much time I’ve wasted in relationships with men who didn’t deserve my love and time.   And then I reflect on all the lessons I’ve learned and realise they all got me to where I am today.   As I fast approach 40, I’m in an amazing place in my life where for maybe the first time ever there is a sense of balance and happiness in every single area of…

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