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Browsing Tag

red flags

Stop letting your problems become your identity

How many people do you know who introduce themselves by talking about their struggles? 🤔  You only need to sit at a nail bar or coffee shop to hear people around you talking about all the things in their lives that are going wrong. Is this something you do too? Do you define yourself by your problems by saying things like “I’m an anxious person”, “I’m a people-pleaser“, “I’m terrible with money“, “I’ve always had shitty relationships“, “I’m just not…

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How I learned to trust myself again after abuse

  When I hit 38 after the end of another abusive relationship, I had completely lost trust in my own judgement. I’d discovered my core wound of abandonment and rejection and… fuck me, did it hurt. 😞  Even after having done a shitload of healing, coaching and other personal development tools since my early twenties, this wound knocked the wind out of me. 💨  I needed time and space to heal.  A lot of space.  Space to reflect on what…

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Shoutout to my haters

  Over the last couple of years, the content I’ve been putting out has focused much more on educating people about unhealthy, toxic and abusive relationships (whatever label you decide to put on it). With that has come an abundance of trolls – plenty of fake accounts leaving shite comments on my posts. GOOD. 😂 My coaches have always taught me to celebrate the haters, because it means I’m getting somewhere.  There’s a growing army of people out there (men…

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When you’re the red flag – examples

  Recently I shared a blog called “Are You The Red Flag?” and promised to follow up with some more examples of what some more red flags can look like from those clients who’ve been wounded in past relationships and are now bringing their baggage into the next one.   So here we are!   REAL EXAMPLES (FROM MY CLIENTS) 🚩   I’m not talking about the obvious red flags like cheating or abuse…   I’m talking about the sneaky…

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Walking on eggshells isn’t love

  If, in your relationship, you feel like you have to monitor your words, your tone, your behaviour, your mood and basically your entire existence to keep your partner happy, this is a mahoosive red flag – it’s not love. 🚩    You stay because you crave connection with them and your nervous system has become used to being happy enough with the bare minimum breadcrumbs they give you.   Because you’ve normalised it so much, it feels familiar and…

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Why confusion is keeping you stuck

  Emotional pain gets a bad rap; but at least pain actually moves you. Confusion paralyses you and keeps you stuck. 😳 PAIN HAS A JOB. CONFUSION JUST SITS THERE LIKE A USELESS EX. Pain is clear, loud, uncomfortable. When something hurts enough, you do something about it. You leave, you speak up, you change. Pain forces action. 🏃‍♀️  But confusion sucks and keeps you in limbo, saying things to yourself like… “Maybe I’m overreacting…” “Maybe it’ll get better…” “Maybe…

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