One of the most fucking annoying people tell survivors of toxic, abusive and narcissistic relationships is: “Just get over it” … as if what you endured was only a bad breakup. 😳 Like you can wake up one morning, decide you’re done thinking about them, and magically move on. But when you’ve spent months or years in a relationship involving manipulation, coercive control, gaslighting, trauma bonding and emotional abuse, they didn’t just hurt your feelings. They totally changed the…
I once listened to an amazing Tim Ferris podcast where he interviewed Catherine Hoke, the “master of second chances.” Catherine runs the not for profit Defy Ventures, which is an entrepreneurship, employment and character development program for currently and formerly incarcerated men, women and youth. I spent 18 years working in Corrections and mental health with people with various labels, and I really resonated with Catherine’s commitment to wanting to make a difference to the planet by…
I often come across Reiki students who are chomping at the bit to learn as much as they can about healing and personal development. I’ll be teaching them Reiki one day and they mention they’ve just learned reflexology, next minute they’re learning tarot, they’re going for a 4 day retreat, doing a bunch of other healing techniques one after the other to “heal” themselves. I don’t blame them – when I first got into this world I was soooo…
Recently I shared a blog called “Are You The Red Flag?” and promised to follow up with some more examples of what some more red flags can look like from those clients who’ve been wounded in past relationships and are now bringing their baggage into the next one. So here we are! REAL EXAMPLES (FROM MY CLIENTS) 🚩 I’m not talking about the obvious red flags like cheating or abuse… I’m talking about the sneaky…
There’s a quiet trap many emotionally intelligent, empathetic people fall into – and I’ve been there in most of my past relationships too. You’re not in love with how they’re showing up right now. You’re in love with who you know they could be. 🤔 You see their depth (you think), their wounds, the backstory that created those wounds, the insight they almost have. You can picture the future version of them so clearly it feels irresponsible not to…
I was watching MAFS the other day (Married At First Sight for those not in the know), and the couples are nearing the end of the experiment. The final challenge was for the group of wives to spend the day together, and so did the husbands. Both groups rock up for their separate lunches and are then told they are going to meet the other person they were matched with. 😳 What unfolded was so interesting; at the moment…